October 2024, story

Homeless

Why do you wish to join us?

I’ve become homeless and I thought perhaps I could move in with you until I get a new home.

Tell us why you became homeless.

You ask ‘why?’  It’s not like it was something that I chose to do. 

Okay, if you must be picky.  How did you become homeless?

I was quite happy in that old house on Barren Hill.  Wouldn’t have moved.  But one day two men came to the house and I heard them talking.

When was that?

You know that time really has no meaning for us, so I’m not sure.  Could have been six months or two years.  Anyway one man said, “It is old and would need some repairs and renovations, but just look at that view over the town all the way to the lake.  Priceless.”  The other man said, “I’ve heard some stories about this property.”  The first man replied, “You know every town has its stories and legends.  If you don’t want to renovate, you could just tear it down and build a brand new contemporary home.”  And the second man said, “I’ll need to think about that.  But you’re right about the view.”  They may have talked some more, but I couldn’t make out what they were saying since they had moved outside..

What did you think?  You weren’t curious or worried?

Nothing happened for a while and so I forgot about it.  And what could I have done?  Anyway, things went on as before until one day workmen showed up and they cleared out the bushes around the house and the property.  Shortly after that heavy equipment arrived and I remembered what the men had said about tearing down my house.  So that night after the workers had left, I managed to introduce water into the fuel tanks.  In the morning there was a lot of swearing and blaming when the men tried to start the engines.  No work was done that day.  I did the same thing when they tried again and again they couldn’t get the engines going.  They thought that some kids were playing tricks so they posted a night watchman.

And the watchman spotted you when you tried a third time?

Yes, and it was really funny to hear him scream when he did.  Haven’t had that much fun since the last couple that rented the house fled in the middle of the night.  But that brought about my move because when he told the others what he saw, they brought in a priest to do an exorcism.  And even though I’m not a demon, we still are bound by the rules and so I had to stop sabotaging their machines and had to leave.  And that’s how I became homeless.

Did they tear down your house after you left?

It was really sad.  I’ve got so many memories attached to the house.  I knew every plank, timber, and nail.  All gone.

And here you are.  Asking us to let you join us.

But not permanently.  Just until they finish building.  Then I will move back.

Wait a minute.  The house is gone and that was the connection that kept you there.  You can’t just haunt a new house.  There’s got to be an attachment.

I died in the garden while weeding the cabbages.  The rules say that qualifies me to return.  After all, I was a lawyer once.  So please, may I stay here?  Temporarily?

I’ll ask the sentiment of the graveyard.   Shall we let this wandering spirit stay for a time?  Any discussion?  Yes?  Oh good point.  You can stay if you do not do any haunting.  That’s reserved for us permanent residents.  Especially with Halloween just around the corner.

I don’t have any choice or good options.  I agree.

Any other questions or discussion?  If not, all in favor say boo or rattle your bones; opposed, wail.  The boos have it.  You are welcome to stay with us temporarily here in Green Lawn. 

Thank you.  And when the house is finished and I move in, you will all be welcome to come and celebrate the first Halloween there.  It’ll be a haunting to remember.